Archive for May, 2008

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NJ man tries to cash forged lottery ticket. News flash: no one believed him, he was arrested

May 11, 2008

An Elizabeth man was arrested after trying to cash a forged scratch off lottery ticket which would’ve had been worth $7,000 if it had been legit. After trying in vain to cash it at local merchants he tried to cash it at the NJ Lottery Commision who decided enough is enough and had him arrested.

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If your bi-plane has lost power should you jump from a high altitude or risk it and see if it can be landed safely?

May 11, 2008

British moron chooses option B, was found “in agony with a broken leg”. The kicker? He had previously closed the throttle twice “because he wanted to give pilots the opportunity to practise unplanned forced landing procedures”.

He denied closing the throttle on the latest occasion.

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Indiana student branded a racist for reading a book about an anti-klan protest

May 11, 2008

If they were reading Roots I bet they would’ve been suspended from school. Luckily they school relented after pressure from the ACLU and the media. The reader said it best “How can you be a racist for reading something that is ANTI-KLAN?” Good question. But when you’re dealing with morons, never ask silly questions

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Kid steals dads credit cards to hire hookers to play X-box with him

May 11, 2008

I’m not sure which part of this story is more hilarious: the fact that this 13 year old kid stole *his dad’s* credit card ands thoguht he’d get away with it, the fact that he spent $1000 on 2 hookers to play Xbox with him or the fact that his ambition is to be a politician.

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Bank robbery hours are 9-5 M-F 9-12 Saturday

May 10, 2008

A man trying to work up the nerve to rob a bank, waited so long it was closed by the time he got to the door. But carrying a gun and wearing a ski mask were enough to tell the bank tellers inside what he wanted, so they called the police and he was arrested.

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If you’re going to rob someone, try picking a victim who can’t douse you with gasoline

May 10, 2008

Mugger tries to steal purse from someone while they were gassing up their car. the mugger got soaked with gas and was eventully caught. he also had failed in two other mugging attempts, and was arrested for those rimes as well.

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crime top 101: don’t post for a picture with your victim before robbing them

May 10, 2008

After jumping into a photo with a group of women at a bar, he robbed them shortly afterward when they left the bar to go to a convenience store. He didn’t recognize them, but they sure did recognize him. They provided the photo to police who found and arrested him.